A year ago I was a mess. Honestly, it was months and months before I felt any concept of time. I spent every day trying to keep the crying under control so I could go to school and get through my shift at work. I am blessed that Gambler is the greatest loss that I have experienced. Many people have lost so much more. But losing Gambler was still the greatest loss of my life so far.
Gamby was the dream come true I never believed was possible. God used that little unwanted horse to teach me so many things. No only how to own and teach a horse, but how to be brave and chase after my goals in life. For much of my life I was a passive person. Waiting for someone else to make my choices for me, I allowed so many opportunities to pass.
But not this one!
Losing a Gambler has made me appreciate horses so much more. I spent eight months without a horse. I never wish to experience that again. When I was sad, there was no neck to cry on. When I was bored, there was no horse to sit with. When I was excited for the future, there was no horse to train. My closet and car and garage were filled with supplies and tack - but no horse.
Yesterday, I almost drove straight home without stopping at the barn. It was cold and windy. I didn't have more than a couple minutes. I was exhausted. But I had a horse. I had to wade through mud in my sneakers to reach her, but it didn't matter.
There are many things in life I take for granted, but Avalon is not one of them. I am full of the same wonder and amazement that I experienced when I first bought Gamby.
(I have my very own horse!!!)
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