Slowing Down

I repeat myself a lot in my blog posts. There are some recurring themes that I emphasize because they are important and others that come up because I learn the same lessons over and over. 

Every individual has a propensity toward certain types of mistakes. Perfectionism is one of mine. I fall into an unhealthy mindset where I need to be doing everything, perfectly,  all the time. Today, for instance, I didn't go to the barn because it was raining. I didn't spend time with friends because I've had a social event nearly every day for over a week. But I don't feel rested. 

I feel restless and lazy. It's ridiculous of course. I'm blogging. I changed the water in my fish tank. I made a healthy breakfast. I'm probably going to clean my room and do laundry before working my seven hour shift. But my mind constantly tells me that I'm not doing enough. This unhealthy, hurried mindset follows me into the equestrian world. If I allow it, my perfectionist mindset will pressure me into pushing Avalon (or myself) too far too fast. 

Expectations. No one has any expectations for me. People I know either think I'm better at training than I am or they don't care at all. I don't have any showing ambitions. I just want to have fun. I need to learn to slow down, both in the equestrian world and in general. Slow down, and trust the process. 

So after the horse expo, brandishing Warwick Schiller's ideas, I brought Avalon into the round pen. I sat down on the ground, closed my eyes, and breathed. I spent the next half hour just sitting, breathing, praying, and listening to the sounds around me. That's all we did. We just relaxed. 

Confused and not so relaxed.

Love seeing her head down.

Then we moved into the arena. I let her move around as much as she wanted. All I asked was that she bring her attention back to me. I waited until she relaxed and focused on me, and then moved to a new spot and repeated the exercise.

Beautiful, but not calm.

Love to see yawning!

Looking at the scary machinery next door.

When she was calm in the arena, we moved the the far pasture connected to the arena (very far away from her pasturemates).

I took this pic on my birthday and titled it #notponyclubapproved

A few weeks in, we added the saddle.

One cloudy day, I put the saddle on Avalon, brought her to the round pen and sat down reading a book.

Aren't you gonna make me do work?

More yawning

Eventually she walked up and began to graze next to me.